List Shmist

Can I just say how much I hate lists like these?

This time, CNNMoney.com took a study that only the most bizarre reader of the World Almanac could appreciate. In this study, it found the "Brainiest Cities."

"Brainiest," of course, means that many citizens have a bachelor's degree.

Not to say that having a bachelor's degree is a worthless thing because I do not think that is true in the least. However, that person with a "General Studies" degree, who took classes on a part-time schedule over the course of 7 years and likely barely passed can shove his "braininess" up his ass.

(Want to be depressed? The above statement might apply to Shaquille O'Neal, who makes more money than probably 95% of you)

Regardless, this particular list, like many that CNNMoney puts out, is pointless. Every city on it is basically either a population center or a college town or some combination of the two (Austin, Columbus, Omaha). The key stats that CNNMoney doesn't point out? Population centers tend to have major businesses in them and major businesses tend to want to hire people with college degrees.

So, the results of this list are just, um, shocking. Really, I'm surprised. Population centers and college towns tend to house smart people. No kidding. I bet you're next going to tell me that the sky is blue, infants are usually shorter than adults, and alcoholics tend to have liver problems.

And this article was the top story today.

Was money actually spent on this study? If it was, I'd bet that the people conducting it weren't from one of these towns.

I'm also sure they missed a town or two, or maybe there's a statistic or two that was off in the study. I'm also sure that there are plenty of other towns out there who house good, honest, hardworking people. Where's the list for friendliest people then?

What are readers supposed to get out of these lists anyway? Are they supposed to automatically move to these cities to affirm their intelligence, or take jobs that they may eventually hate? Are they supposed to move to these cities for their short commutes, which will inevitably cause long commutes when everyone moves there? Not that you would move to these cities. I mean, Bismarck, North Dakota is on this list...

Enough already! Home is where you feel at home. The best city in the world is your hometown, if you put a little pride and work into it. If you're so smart, live where you feel most comfortable. Find a job that fits your needs. Stop buying into these ridiculous lists, and better yet, email CNN or Money and tell them to give it a rest already!

I already did. I told them that the list was pointless and flawed. I reasoned that any list that would put Naperville, IL among the Top 5 Best Places to Live had to be illegitimate. Come on, have you been to Naperville? Have you put up with their crazy driving? Have you seen these shiny, plastic people?

...I've received no response yet.