Come on down!...to say goodbye

I just had to comment on this.

The reason? I never thought I would see the headline. I seriously thought that the man would do the show until he died.

He might yet...he said he's quitting next June.

Even after that, I hear that "The Price is Right" is on a huge tape delay, so we may be seeing Barker on the show until at least next December.

Don't get me wrong: I don't WANT Barker to die on the set. It's just...wow. I seriously can't imagine Barker not doing the show. 35 years hosting "The Price Is Right"? 50 years in television overall? Especially in today's "work 'til you drop" atmosphere, I cannot possibly fathom anyone breaking Barker's record on either that show or any other show, for that matter.

I don't get to watch "The Price Is Right" anymore, but it's always something to flip on in the daytime that neither I, nor anyone else I can think of, for that matter, could hate. How can you not like, "The Price Is Right?" People win new cars, boats, appliances, cash, etc. It's awesome! And I wish I were on it!

And Barker made the show what it is. Sure, "Barker's Beauties" helped the show a ton, but Bob Barker IS "The Price Is Right." His appeal spanned generations. Even though he went through 2 or 3 other announcers, Barker remained a staple. He knew the games. He knew the people. He got kisses from 340-pound, 55-year-old women, and model-type 23-year-old women. He gives away more new cars in a month than some dealerships do in a year. If there is a man who can be called an "institution," it is Barker.

And now he's going to leave? I can't imagine who could replace him.

No matter who does replace him though, the show just won't be the same.

A Bright Spot for the Cubs

In recognition of Chicago Cubs fans finding the silver lining in every cloud...

Congratulations, Cubs!

You're better by comparison!

Chicago Cubs 2006 record against World Series teams: 11-11 (decent...)

Chicago Cubs 2006 record against World Series CHAMPION St. Louis Cardinals: 11-8

Yep. The last-place team in the National League (and 3rd-worst team overall) took the season series from the World Series champs.

Does that mean anything? Probably not.

But enh, the Cards were due.

Absolutely Stunning...Or Is It?

I refuse to get optimistic over polls.

Polls can lie...even today.

Ask Harry Truman in 1948.

Ask Carty Finkbeiner, current mayor of Toledo, in 1993.

Polls don't mean much.

What does mean much: this.

The Republican Party is surrendering Mike DeWine's TV ads in Ohio?

There's got to be a catch. Either they expect DeWine to pull it out in the end anyway because it's Ohio, or Republicans are planning a different strategy for DeWine.

It just can't be that the Republican Party is giving up a U.S. Senate race in Ohio. It just can't be that Ohioans have seen the end of DeWine's smear-happy commercials.

Can it?

Are Ohioans this mad over the Coingate scandal? Are they finally opening up to ideas that the Democratic Party might have? Are these polls really that symbolic of Ohio sentiment?

If so, I'd be stunned. Ohio hasn't went "Blue" for anything since Clinton was re-elected.

I'd like to believe that Ohioans have finally gotten fed up with a stagnant economy and empty Republican promises. I'd like to believe that Mike DeWine is going down with the rest of the old-guard Bob Taft brigade. I'd like to believe that Ohioans are finally going to make the right choice.

But read the title of this blog. I want proof...

Marty McFly enters politics

So Michael J. Fox has entered the political scene in the U.S., in Maryland, Missouri, and Wisconsin (CNN article here).

He is, understandably, advocating candidates who support stem-cell research, in the belief that such research may eventually provide a cure for Parkinson's Disease, a nervous disorder from which he suffers. Parkinson's causes its victims to shake, almost completely uncontrollably. How badly it affects Fox can be seen in one of his political spots here.

Republican backlash has come primarily from Rush Limbaugh, who said that Fox was either "acting," or, "off his medication." A competent doctor, seen in each article above, refutes this claim.

I am hardly surprised at Limbaugh's amazing lack of sensitivity, since this has proven to be an indispensable trait shown by Rush in the past. I am even less surprised, however, at Limbaugh's missing the larger point.

The larger point of which I speak of: even if Fox is acting or off his medication (and he claims that, ironically, he was TOO medicated), so what?

The only reason I am surprised at Fox appearing in these political ads is because I thought he was not an American citizen. He was born in Canada, but he must have acquired dual citizenship at some point. Apparently, he has lived in California for some time now, and though he is likely not a resident of the States in which his political ads are appearing, as an American, I believe that Fox has a right to convey his opinion on such an issue.

Does Fox suffer from Parkinson's Disease? If he doesn't, it's the greatest hoax in American history. Does he likely take medication to improve his ability to cope with the disease? I can't see why not. Will stem-cell research aid in coming up with newer, better medications to treat Parkinson's Disease? Maybe, but I don't know.

If Fox feels that such research will help, why shouldn't he speak up about supporting it? He's in pain, he wants help, so he's expressing his desire that Americans venture down the avenue of stem-cell research to investigate. What's the problem?

Republicans, who are largely opposed to stem-cell research, will say that the problem is that of Fox exploiting his disease for political purposes. My question is, how is Fox exploiting it if he's being open and candid about it? Isn't exploitation connotated with the idea that one person is using another person to achieve some sort of ill-gotten gain? If anything, in this situation, I see Fox using political candidates to push his own issues by piggy-backing onto their campaigns...and, um, that's no crime.

Democrats and Republicans alike receive money from special-interest groups and other issue-advocacy organizations in order that those candidates promote the agendas of those groups. Everyone in politics is guilty of this because that's how politics works. Even if donations to political candidates by these groups were to cease, little exists to stop these groups from putting issues on ballots, trying to sway the public to one side or the other of an issue. In other words, even if Fox weren't backing candidates here, he could push to have the issue of stem-cell research put on the ballots in certain states for approval or disapproval by the public.

And either way, Fox would be exerting his influence.

Bottom line: as things stand now in the political process, there is nothing wrong with what Fox is doing. He suffers from Parkinson's Disease, he thinks stem-cell research would help, and he spoke out about it. Nothing Limbaugh or any other critic could say would change the fact that Fox has a right to express his opinion about this issue that so profoundly affects him. So what if it was done to help one candidate or the other? That's how the system works.

What bothers me is Limbaugh and his supporters not recognizing the double-edged sword on this point. Limbaugh's show is entirely done for the political gain of the Conservative Right. Listen to his show, and this point is obvious.

If Rush can speak up about a point on an issue, he has to sit back and let the other side present their view. That's how the American system works. No side, especially Rush's, can have it their own way, all the time, even though that's how they'd like it.

Come and waste another year...

Please, make the pain of another season go away...

Havlat is injured too. He was injured last year. He'll likely be injured again.

I don't want to pay for Blackhawks tickets right now...I really don't. Why give money to a team that doesn't get it?

I think some of them actually just get injured so they don't have to wear the Chicago uniform out onto the ice. I really do.

I'm finding an East team to throw my hat upon. I'm really fed up.

The Chicago Sports Pessimism with Mark

I'm sorry in advance if that title is copyrighted. I claim ignorance.

So let me call it instead, "A Guy in DeKalb Making Observations About Chicago Sports"

But I just need to comment on a few things from this past week:

1) The Cubs hire Lou Piniella- That's it? That's your solution for curing a nearly 100-year World Series Championship drought? Lou Piniella? Look, the man has won one, count 'em, ONE World Series title, and that was before he just plain went psycho.
Pinella is not the answer. The answer is forming a cohesive team unit with strong pitching and competent hitting that doesn't constantly get injured. There, I'm instantly smarter than Jim Hendry (WHO INEXPLICABLY HAS KEPT HIS JOB!)
And now the Cubs are talking about getting A-Rod? Have you seen what he's done in New York? So let me get this straight: he'll face LESS pressure in a city whose media predominantly comments on baseball, on a club that hasn't won a championship in 98 years. Right.
I know what the Cubs are thinking: Cubs fans don't have patience to wait another year for a championship. That may be true, but the Cubs fans will be forced to have patience. Piniella will not get the Cubs to the World Series. No one will do so until the Cubs make a consistent effort toward winning, and Piniella was bribed to come to Chicago under this exact false pretense. Throwing money at the 7th-highest payroll in baseball is NOT making a consistent effort; it's just that: throwing money at the 7th-highest payroll in baseball. 99 years come next Fall, Chicago.

2) Bears fans drunk and ecstatic over beating Arizona: No, the Bears are not going to the Super Bowl. Playoffs? Sure. But is Rex Grossman a consistent-quality QB? Not by a longshot, if his performance against Arizona is any indication. I'll give them this: their defense is good. But the Bears' defense was good last year, and look how that turned out. I just don't buy that this team is good enough to win a championship, and I don't BELIEVE that Bears fans are actually saying that they'll go UNDEFEATED. Get off the Crack! The Bears are not going undefeated- not with three games against the Giants, Jets, and Patriots (all away games) and with inconsistencies remaining on offense.

3) The Bulls: yeah, I don't really care about the Bulls.

4) The White Sox: Hey Ozzie: aren't you glad you refused to play worthy players in the All-Star Game this year? I mean, since you obviously went back to the World Series like you planned...oh...right. Maybe you should have given those starters some rest last year, huh? Overrated manager says what?

5) The Blackhawks: Well, nice to see that they're in first place for the moment. Will it last? Yeah, that'd be nice. I'll give GM Dale Tallon this: he at least made the Hawks more exciting to watch by adding Martin Havlat and Bryan Smolinski. But he obviously overpaid for Khabibulin, and though Nikolai has been stout in goal so far this year, I don't buy that any among this trio has the power to stay healthy...or in Khabibulin's case, good. Good luck anyway, Hawks.

6) The Fire: Sorry, I don't drive a minivan with a soccer logo on the back, so I can't comment on this.

That's your Chicago Sports Pessimism...I'm Mark.

UPDATE: And...adding Alan Trammell to the Cubs' bench doesn't help anything...

This is funny. Please watch. And then scroll down.

Thanks September Fund

And this is sad. Please read.

A high school student, nearly 2,800 miles away in California, is a threat to President Bush? Really? Well gosh, don't forget to investigate employees at the Hello Kitty! factory too. I bet they were involved in some way too.

Does this high school student pose the same type of threat that homosexuals do? You know, because they're knocking down my door and trying to break up my engagement all the time?

Um, compared to North Korea right now, for example, how great of a threat does this high school student pose? Is she hiding nuclear weapons in her diary or something?

I've said it before and I'll say it again: damn, this government has some screwed-up priorities.

Northwest Ohio, You Make Me So Damn Proud Sometimes...

Teen Faces Litter Charge for Bra Antenna

By Associated Press

TOLEDO, Ohio - A teenager who put her bra on a car antenna before it flew off and led to a highway accident will be charged with littering, a prosecutor said. Emily Davis, 17, of Bowling Green, told investigators she took her bra off while her friend was driving on Interstate 75.

James Campbell, who was driving behind the girls, said he swerved to avoid the bra and his car flipped several times. Campbell, 37, broke a vertebra in his neck during the Sept. 26 accident. His passenger, Jeff Long, 40, broke several ribs.

A State Highway Patrol crash report, obtained by The Blade, said that the girls told investigators that before the accident the men were motioning to them to lift up their shirts. Both men denied making the gestures.

Davis will be charged next week with misdemeanor littering, said Tim Atkins, a juvenile prosecutor in Wood County. Atkins said he'll meet with troopers before filing the charge.

The girl's friend, Tabitha Adams, 17, of Bowling Green, said she told Davis not to hang her bra outside because she knew it would fly away, according to the report.

Atkins said no other charges were expected.

An Open Letter to Brian Vickers

Dear Brian Vickers,

Though I am not a NASCAR Nextel Cup driver, I feel that I must explain some fairly basic, and almost certainly well-known, concepts to you:

1. When fighting for the win at the end of a race, do not, under any circumstances, spin out your teammate.

2. When fighting for the win at the end of a Talladega race, do not, under any circumstances, do something that causes Dale Earnhardt, Jr. to crash.

3. Never, ever combine concepts 1 and 2.

But since you did, if I were you, I wouldn't go home for a while...you might find it burned down. I also wouldn't open your mail alone, nor would I go outside without a bodyguard.

As for the rest of your family, I'd talk to the FBI and ask about getting them into the Witness Relocation Program.

Oh, don't worry Brian, I won't do anything to you. In fact, your actions caused my favorite driver, Kasey Kahne, to finish 2nd. Who knows? NASCAR might even deprive you of your win (which, if they want their rules to have any teeth, they should) and award it to Kasey instead.

But I can't control other enraged Dale Earnhardt, Jr. and Jimmie Johnson fans.

Nor can I control those drivers on the track during future races.

Watch your back for a while buddy...

UPDATE: And by the way...well-said, Bill Elliott.

Your turn, Jim

"I'm gone, I won't be back. Somebody's got to take the blame, and it might as well be me."

Thank you, Dusty Baker. Throughout all the hardship, all the blame, you took it with class. You were a man, stood up to the critics, and basically said, "Yeah, I know we're losing, and I know I'm going to get blamed for it. Well, if they're gonna fire me, they're gonna fire me. At least I tried."

Yes, Dusty Baker did try. And he was fired. I can't see any reason why Jim Hendry wouldn't have fired him. Someone has to take the blame off of Hendry...

It won't be Cubs Team President Andy MacPhail either. He also took it like a man, accepted that things weren't going well, and stepped aside to let someone else give it a shot. MacPhail was equally blunt in his assessment of the Cubs' situation: "It's not just that we had a terrible season," he said. "I've been here 12 seasons and only two postseason [appearances] and to me that's not what I came here to do. Obviously, I've not been as effective as I wanted to be."

Thank you, Andy MacPhail. You acknowledged that you tried, that you had a goal to succeed, and that you failed. You did the right thing by stepping aside. And hey, even two playoff seasons is better than some of your Chicago predecessors could do.

So MacPhail is gone, Baker is gone...

I guess the only question to ask is, will GM Jim Hendry at least do the right thing and step aside as well?

I have a vision of Hendry, sitting in his office, watching the resignations unfold in front of him, thinking to himself, "Well, they're shouldering the blame. I guess everything's golden in my world!" Yeah, for the moment Jim, everything is "golden" in your world.

And why the hell is that?

It's always been easy to blame Dusty for the Cubs' woes. Hell, it would even be easy to blame Jim Hendry for not firing Dusty. The problem remains though, that neither Dusty Baker nor any other manager, should be expected to win with a complete crap team. No motivator could take this current team and get them anywhere beyond a third place finish.

And the only man left to blame for the construction of this team is Hendry.

Hendry stood by Mark Prior and Kerry Wood, though he knew, HAD to have known, that they would get injured again. He brought in players who weren't good beyond a supporting role: Jacque Jones and Juan Pierre. He thought he had all the pieces, and when he saw that he was wrong, Hendry signed known rejects like Phil Nevin. This was following the terrible signing of Jeromy Burnitz last year. Hendry also created a terrible farm system that was called up too early to save a team that was beyond saving. He relied on sub-par pitchers, and refused to go after a competent pitching coach to try to ameliorate the situation (Leo Mazzone himself was available last year).

Perhaps the worst sin Hendry committed this year: backing Derrek Lee with nothing, no power bat, no consistent substitute. When Lee went injured, the Cubs went down.

That's where Nevin was supposed to come in. Why again?

Instead, Hendry sat back and let Dusty take the blame. He distracted the team by leaving Baker's status open at the All-Star Break. He let Baker dangling in the wind with no life support, while he, for the most part, dodged criticism. Sure, the Chicago media and fans were hard on Hendry from time to time, but they were hard on Baker ALL the time.

And every time, Dusty's team came to his defense. When he was under pressure the most, they won for him. They showed Chicago that they would play for Dusty Baker. They even stood up for him again in the article on Baker that you can link to above.

But injuries crippled the team, and the overall lack of skill players ground the team to a halt. They might have played for Dusty, but they didn't play very well.

So the team sucked. So Baker sucked. So the Bleacher fans littered the field with trash in frustration. All the while, Hendry sat comfortably in his seat, last year when the Sox won the Series, and this year, as the Cubs were almost the worst team in baseball.

Enough. It's time for Hendry to get out of that seat. If MacPhail and Baker are out, Hendry should be out too. Cubs fans have been through 98 years without a World Series now, and they should not (and indeed Baker even said that they should not) be made to sit through another year without one. I think I speak for many Cubs fans when I say that I don't want Hendry to be given this off-season to try to put together a winner. I think it's a proven fact by now that he CAN'T put together a winner.

Proof: just look at this season. The free agent market was bubbling over with possible talent, but Hendry didn't get any of it. He either can't negotiate with other teams or he doesn't want to. The Cubs had a very good chance to make the playoffs in what was one of the weakest years for the National League yet, and they couldn't do it. They couldn't even make a run at it. For that reason, MacPhail rightly stepped aside. If I were Baker, I'd have resigned before Hendry got the opportunity to fire me. Why get gunned down by the man who can't shoot straight?

But I must digress. I could go on about the Cubs' problems all day. I can't even begin to address the problems with Tribune Company continuing to own the team (which will only serve to damage the team more. Tribune Company is so stingy with money and management that their cable company, Comcast, won't even put ESPN on basic cable, though many other national cable outlets have already done so. You get "local channels," some of which are in Spanish, instead. Thank you SO MUCH, Tribune Company).

The point is: The Cubs have many, many problems. The players took the blame. The manager took the blame. The Team President took the blame. Everyone, it seems, has shouldered some of the blame except Hendry. All Hendry can say after today?

"Maybe if I'd done a lot better, it wouldn't be this way."

At least you got that right, Jim.

Hendry's arrogance and cowardice should not be rewarded. I've said it before, and I will say it again: Kick Jim Hendry to the curb.